Tuesday, May 17, 2011

is it Rumplestiltskin?

Crazy title for a post about a baby, but it's exactly how I feel. More on that later ...

This is a true journal post. The detail is extensive for record keeping purposes; you are forewarned:). If you'd just like to see some really cute pictures, scroll down to the end. (Or since my computer isn't cut and pasting again, (didn't we just get this fixed), please enjoy the pictures out of order above and then read the story, if you'd like, below.

Here is the story behind Baby Boy Bailey:).

May 13th was my doctor's appointment day, and also my 40th week and 1 day mark of pregnancy. I was not surprised, since I went over with Sophie; and it was quite convenient, considering all of the change that's happened in our family life over the last 3 weeks.

Matt was set to proctor two finals at 1:30 and 4:30 and so I dropped off Wes, Kate and Sophie at his work at 11:45 a.m. so I could go to my doctor's appointment and then pick up the kids with plenty of time for him to get to his 1:30 exam. So I did, not knowing I wouldn't see them for nearly 24 hours.

As soon as the nurse put the heart monitor thingy on my stomach I knew something was wrong. I thought she was picking up my heart rate, not the baby's. She moved it around, but still was picking up a slower heart rate. The doctor paused from his paperwork, looked up, and then stood up to try to adjust the monitor himself. After about a minute he said, "the heart rate is a little slower than I'd like; how about if we set you up in the other room for a stress test."

So that's what we did, but it continued to be slow and the alarm kept going off (acknowledging too slow of a beat for its liking). After 20 minutes the doctor came in and said he'd like me to go grab something to eat, and head to the hospital for a more thorough stress test. I said okay, and calmly walked out the door. As soon as I hit the parking lot something took over ... side note: I'm not a very emotional person (although I cry easily at movies and church meetings), but as I left the building a flood gate opened. I'm still not really sure why, other than it was an unexpected turn of events (why should it be when I'm overdue?), and I wasn't mentally prepared to have the baby yet (ditto comment as parenthesis above); plus I was afraid of how this would affect Matt, his schedule, etc., which seems ridiculous now, but was very real to me then. Where were we going to leave our children if I needed to be admitted? etc., etc. We had some things lined up, but for some reason I felt completely overwhelmed. So I sat in the car taking deep breaths so I would be composed when I called Matt.


He picks up the phone and I lose it all over again. He repeats, "hello," since I'm unable to speak coherently; then I tell him what's going on and he calmly says, "Heather, I'll take care of everything, you just go take care of you." I instantly feel better.

I grabbed a chicken sandwich from the dollar menu at Wendy's, very tasteless, and headed to the hospital. I never went on a tour of the hospital and so am pretty lost, but finally make my way to labor and delivery - still thinking I'd just get the test over and be able to go home and get myself ready for delivery in the next couple of days.

I'm greeted at the door by my new neighbor's daughter; someone I met only a week ago but we talked on a few occasions and I connected with quickly. That makes me feel better and she guides me into the test room and hooks me up to a machine. After about 30 minutes the doctor on call comes in and says, "so what do you want to do?" I looked at her blankly and then she explained that the baby's heart rate was low, and there was an arrhythmia. She also said 'the recovery rate' wasn't there, which I can't remember what that meant but basically wasn't pleasing her. She said she'd prefer to admit me into the hospital, since I was overdue anyway, and the test she'd have to perform to give me the go-ahead to go home would most likely put me into labor anyway. So essentially my decision was made for me.

By this time it was about 3:00 p.m., an hour and a half or so into Matt's test. So I called his department secretary to ask her to get him out of the test so I could tell him. I'm put on hold while he comes. When he does I tell him the news. (At this point I have to apologize for going back and forth between present and past tense, I'm not keeping track).

He says okay and I give him an update of who I've called for child care, etc., and he tells me not to worry and that he'll be there as soon as he can.

I get checked in, gowned up, and hooked up. They start the pitocin at about 4 p.m. - Matt arrives shortly before 5 and says the department head and his wife have taken W, K, and S. So now their family of four (4-year old twins) has expanded to 5 children, 5-yrs and under. They are the greatest and are some of the most sincere and good-souled people we know here. Matt said they just stepped right in and said not to worry. The Dept. head proctored Matt's last exam while his wife, who works in the next department over, took the kids home after picking hers up. Good thing they have a van:).

So now that that's settled, we start to focus on the task at hand. Matt has this way of trying not to smile in certain situations and it feels good to me that he's excited, despite the unplanned timing. I keep saying that, which seems silly since we were overdue and you usually can't plan these things, but I guess we just thought we'd get through the weekend and then be able to mentally prepare for the big arrival.

By about 7:30 p.m. the contractions are hard and I'm thinning, mentally. I've never been able to visualize well and have always had the desire to be unmedicated, but have always given in to the pain. What I'm amazed at is recently, every single one of my pregnant friends have posted amazing natural birth stories. I am in awe. At 8:15 p.m. an epidural is in place and I'm feeling much more optimistic about life.

My body has a history of progressing very slowly so I settle in for a long night. Matt and I have a great conversation not afforded us very often at home any more. We talk of his finals, student stories and the possibility of having a Friday the 13th baby.

A maybe not so well-known fact about me is I'm a student/lover of numbers. Matt hasn't really found a pattern in it, although he thinks it strange. At first he just thought I loved prime numbers, then odd numbers, then that theory was blown away. For example ... I like the numbers, 3, 7, 9, 11, 13, not 14 or 15, but 16 and 17 are okay; no-go on 18; but 19 is good; 20 no; 21, 22 no; 23 yes, 24 no; 25 is okay but not preferred; 26 and 27 yes; 28 no; 29 yes, and 30, 31 not so much. So for the days of the month I was so hoping this baby would show up before midnight.

By about 9:45 I'm starting to feel heavy pressure. I tell Matt and decide to wait a little to see if it really is that and if we should call the nurse/doctor. Then at about 10 p.m. I'm bleeding along with the pressure. So Matt gets the nurse, who calls the doctor and I'm checked and they say, "let's have a baby!" They're suited up and tell me when I feel the pressure to push. After one push the doctor says, "okay, we'll have this baby in one or two more pushes." So we wait for a few seconds and push again. I can feel the doctor adjusting things down below and I think of one of my friend's posts who said when her midwife did that, the pain was excruciating. Then the last push and out comes baby. These are the doctor's words as the final push is going on, "wow, you're a fat little one, it's a BOY, mom!"

I was shocked. This is two for two for me, with me being wrong about the gender. I was positive Sophie was a boy, and although I wanted a boy this go-around, I was positive it was a girl. So for any future children out there, I need to either not try to guess, or just guess opposite of what I'm sure it is.

I didn't feel the flood of emotion this time like I did with Sophie, I was just shocked. I was convinced I was a boy mom who was going to have a house full of girls.

He was weighed and came in at 9 lbs. 6 oz., which to me is pretty deceiving because he's got a smaller head, like Kate's, and chicken legs, like both grandpa's:), so where all that weight is stored, I don't know.

When he was put on my chest I still thought, "it's a boy? how can it be?"

After about an hour he was taken to the nursery and received other care then brought back to me. Matt left for some much needed rest and I spent my first night with my 2nd little son.

In the morning Matt brought Wes, Kate and Sophie and told me as they walked in the room, "they don't know what he is, they haven't asked if it's a boy or girl." They were just excited to have stayed the night at our friend's house, that we had a new baby, and that they were now able to share all this wonderful news with me. We then announced we had a boy and they were all so excited. Kate quickly forgot the news she'd told me two days before that she wanted a sister and that she'd be very sad if we had a boy.

Throughout the day the baby and I began our recovery and I still wondered what name he'd be called. Matt and I had asked the nurses if they had a baby book and they presented a 2" thick copy of names. I religiously flipped through every page and jotted down names I thought were possibilities. Matt and our children visited right before bedtime ("we're having a pizza party Mom, and we got a MOVIE!"), and we passed a few names between us, without any luck.

I forgot to mention when Matt called my parents to tell them the news and told my mom we were considering the name Ivan (which we weren't), there were 5 solid seconds of silence on the other end of the phone. Matt has this delight in teasing my mother.

By Sunday morning I was finished with the hospital. The nurses had been wonderful, but I was ready to be home. Good thing we stayed though (we could've gone home 24 hours after the birth but since it was late into the p.m., they suggested we stay an extra night) because the next morning's exam by the pediatrician revealed a fractured clavicle (big babies sometimes are squinched just so in the birth canal that they suffer a fracture during birth), and more heart issues - 2-4 skipped beats per minute, calling for an EKG.

I was about to go stir-crazy but by about 4 p.m. we were finally released, with instructions for follow up visits on the two concerns.

But what about a name? Well 5 minutes before we left the hospital Matt said, "Well you said you wanted a name with significance? Either a family name or something religious/biblical? How about Gordon?"

I looked at him funny.

"What? He was one of the most revered prophets in our time."

I wasn't buying his sincerity.

"Well then how about Brigham?"

That struck a cord.

Me: "I like it ... Brigham Bailey. I really like it."

Him: "You do?" (I think his sincerity maybe wasn't 100% on this suggestion either)

Me: "I really do."

Him: "Okay, let's do it ... you do realize this is almost the same way we came up with Wes' name."

Me: "Yes."

Him: "Okay."

Brigham it was ........ for 2 about minutes. I left the room to go back to the nursery and when I came back Matt said, "No, it's not Brigham."

So without going into any more revealing detail, that's been the story of our lives for the last week. We suggest names to each other and haven't been able to come to a consensus. I've told Matt we're not doing this again for any future children that may be up there ... it's been a pain at doctor's appointments, and the insurance company isn't liking/buying it either. You'd think that after 9+ months, we would've been able to make this decision, but oh well, he sure is cute though. Many times I have felt just like the miller's daughter-turned queen in Rumpelstiltskin as she's trying to guess the funny little man's name.

Now just some thoughts:

-Matt's been a rock through all of this, keeping us afloat during transition.
-I forgot how much I love all the sounds and faces a newborn makes.
-We really need a van. It was one of those things that didn't get done.
-We moved into the best neighborhood for us now. Our neighbors have truly taken us in.
-It's hard not having family close by, although our ward family and aforementioned- neighbors have been awesome.
-Each day I hold this little guy I love him more and more and our connection deepens. I've truly been blessed with a wonderful family.

Saturday, May 14, 2011


Hello blogosphere. Matt here.

Just wanted to let you all know that Heather delivered a 9 lb, 6 ounce baby boy on May 13 at 10:22 pm. More details and pictures to follow once we get them home. Mom and baby are doing just fine. No name as of yet.

Monday, May 9, 2011

We've almost made it

Quick update ...

No baby yet; due date on Thursday.

Still boxes everywhere, but slowly making progress.

LOVE the neighborhood - great neighbors.

Our children have made friends here.

Got phone and internet up and going today ... honestly have not missed it.

Matt's finishes school on Friday! Can we make it until then? Of course we can.